REDDIT'S DEAD, BABY

(AND MUSK'S LOVECHILD KILLED IT)

So then! I'm near positive nobody actually knew this, but at one point during the course of this month, I had a reddit account! Granted I didn’t do much with it—I found it a challenge to navigate, and the userbase was dominated by a certain sort of folk I don’t acclimate well to. The kinds with a penchant for strictness, and instilled with the undying desire to see others punished in accordance to arbitrary guidelines for posting.

Sufficed to say, I like how Tom and the NG Team run this place, a lot better than the ever-changing “micro-communities” of Reddit. But, Elon forced my (alongside many other’s) hand(s) upon single-handedly destroying Twitter through some of the most baffling managerial decisions I have ever seen a nepo-baby commit to the digital record. So, we went elsewhere, in search of a new bulletin board to nail our crayon scribbles to for the whole world to see.

While one may see my lack of posting there being owed to my day job bleeding me for time, I have now come to gain an otherwise superstitious appreciation for my inaction, seeing it more as fate. For you see my dear reader, the union-busting Advanced Publications (parent company to Reddit.com and majority stakeholder) decided to partner with the one baby that Musk actually wants to claim: OpenAI

Yes, the very same OpenAI who’s CEO had flaunted his creation to Congress as a killer of man, the Torment Nexus from the classic sci-fi novel “Don’t Create the Torment Nexus”. The same company behind the very first in human-killing artificial intelligence products, ChatGPT; a spin-off of CleverBot with half the wit and twice the lies, but triple the potential for murder! Though so far the only things it has managed to murder are a few prosecutor's career’s and AirCanada’s Wallet. However, there’s another victim on the chopping block! And its name is Reddit.

At an unknown time in the future, Reddit will allow all the collective slurs, historical inaccuracies, and sage-like wisdom of answering a question with 20 other questions (before you’re told to “stop necroposting” and have your thread subsequently locked & archived) to be interpreted by The Jaunt beneath OAI’s headquarters, to then be regurgitated back to you in a brown slurry-like form straight down your gullet, once they implement chat bot integration for your average user! Hurray!

If this massive and whimsical breach of privacy wasn’t enough of a red flag, let me hammer it in: OpenAI is a data-driven company. Without it, they wouldn’t exist. If you think this is going to stop at text, you’re wrong. They’ll scrape that hellhole for all that’s on it, and sell what they can’t put in their comically large slurry machine to other prospective buyers. They’re undoubtedly going to scrape the site for images, and I for one, cannot abide letting them do that with my art. And not to tell you your business, but you shouldn’t either. This isn’t “inevitable”, this is a company taking the last vestiges of creative freedom and expression, putting it in their mouths, chewing it up, and sharting it back out, with an ungodly amount of wasted electric to boot. It’s NFTs 2.0, and while it will die inevitably, I don’t know when. And until then, I want to keep my creations safe from these greedy bastard’s clutches.

TL;DR: Fuck Reddit, fuck OpenAI, fuck Musk for setting any of this in motion, I’m deleting my Reddit account and likely never returning.